No boy-news in this email. They are all happy and healthy and wonderful... re-read activities from last week - pretty much the same stuff this week.
This week's update is about how I've been spending my time the last few weeks and some of the things I've realized with a little bit of spare time to think...
I've been quilting! And I've loved it! For those of you who haven't seen my posts on Facebook or Instagram, I'm working on a Lori Holt applique pattern called Granny's Garden. It's cute and feminine and has flowers and adorable prints - and about a zillion steps.
I have had a lot more free time to work on this over the last few weeks than I have had to do pretty much anything crafty for the last few years and I'm only done with 3 blocks. There are 42 blocks! And that's not including the borders. I thought I'd share some progress with you because I love to share pretty stuff - and also because when I stop and think about how much time I've already invested and how much more there is to do, I get a little intimidated. Maybe more than a little.
Each block requires the following: Rough cut fabric, cut wax paper (my chosen method of applique), trim fabric to correct shape, iron fabric to wax paper (my least favorite part), position shapes on background, sew shapes to background (stop and admire the adorable), sew background with newly bloomed flower to circle of interfacing to create a pancake, sew pancake to block background - rejoice! One's done!
I know some people might like to do one block at a time - from start to finish. I don't do that. I like to have blocks in various stages so when I get bored with one step I can do something else for a while. This also helps get blocks ready to travel - because only 2 of those steps up there lend themselves to stepping away from my work space - which is one of my very favorite parts of applique patterns. Anyway... I like to have stuff all over the place and in varying levels of completeness - which adds to both the mess and the mental chaos.
I was considering all of this one day while mindlessly cutting wax paper shapes and I realized a few things. These are my lessons and my take-aways, but since I regularly overshare with you all in these updates, I thought I'd share. Maybe someone will find something useful in my musings...
Intimidation
This is an intimidating project. 42 blocks is a lot of blocks. When you look at the number of shapes on each block and the number of steps required... it's a small wonder anyone decides to tackle a project like this. And I think that's a bit like life. If you stop and think about all of the things that need to be done it would be paralyzingly scary. If you think about all of the steps needed to complete just about anything successfully (or even attempt and fail) - it's terrifying. But if you just look at one block at a time and remember to rejoice with each step, then before you know it, it's 1/5th done. then half, and then you are tidying up with the final stitches and standing back to admire. One step at a time. One day at a time. And don't forget to rejoice and admire!
Imperfections
My blocks aren't perfect. My shapes are a little wonky. I could stand to spend a bit more time trying to get things even and centered. I noticed one particularly bad "miss" on the block in the upper right hand corner (affectionately known as #6). It's really off center. And it's up in the corner - not a spot I can really hide very well. By the time I realized how screwed up that poor, adorable flower is it was a little too late to fix it. I had basically 3 options: 1) Cry, 2) Start over, 3) Accept it as is and move on. I picked #3... and here's why... if my stitches were all perfect and all my blocks looked exactly like the pattern then how would my grandkids grandkids ever be able to tell the difference between my quilt and someone else's? If we were all perfectly recreating someone else's vision, then the result would be a bunch of boring cookie cutter final projects*. My imperfections are mine - and came from my hands, my interpretations, my best efforts.
This idea of accepting imperfection is really something that is a little hard for a recovering perfectionist, but when I look around at all of the things I've had a hand helping to create - my home, my career, my marriage, or my kids - any one of you could look and find issues, problems, imperfections. You may see the way my boys keep their rooms and think I could be doing a better job creating men who clean and a house to be proud of. You may see the scratches in my hardwoods and take pause because I've let my dogs mess up my previously perfect floors. You may read that I got laid off and rationalize that I surely screwed something up to find myself in this situation. (I tried to think of something "wrong" with my marriage, but I'm a bit at a loss... ;) ) All of these imperfections and yet here I am, happy and content. So what would I gain by trying to make all this stuff fit some arbitrary ideal of perfect? What would I have to give up in the process?
I'm OK with my imperfections. Some of them I will see, acknowledge and work to improve upon. Some of them, I will recognize and then move on. Some of them, I don't even notice. Some of them I wouldn't even call imperfections - so if you do, that's on you. I think it's a pretty healthy thing to look at the reality of the things we are working on and realize that there isn't a "perfect" that's worth chasing. Imperfect is perfect.
Celebrate little steps
Look, this quilt (and this thing we call life - raising kids, forming relationships, growing spiritually, contributing to something, earning a living, etc.) is a long haul. It's one block at a time. It's bouncing from one step to another and then backtracking again. Two steps forward, one step back. Sometimes you hit the "chute" and end up many steps back. Sometimes it's the "ladder". The goal is to add stuff to the "done" pile while simultaneously lamenting the giant size of the "to do" pile. And all along the road, we should be celebrating. Look how cute that flower turned out! No, really, look! Hang it up and admire and then take it down to work on the next thing. Life is like that too. At the end of every day, there's something to celebrate. I guarantee it. Don't believe me? Try looking for a reason to celebrate - even while acknowledging that you have to get up and do it all again tomorrow, next week, next year. Try it! Even on bad days, there's something to celebrate. I mean - who doesn't celebrate finishing your taxes or tying a bow on that last wrapped Christmas present or not undercooking the hamburgers? Go ahead - celebrate the little wins! That's what makes this whole thing fun, fulfilling, and worthwhile.
Enjoy the process
If all I wanted was a finished, adorable quilt, I would buy it. It would be far cheaper (really at any price) for me to buy one than it is for me to make this quilt. If all I wanted was the end result, this whole thing is a complete waste of time and talent (albeit imperfect talent). The truth is, you have to enjoy the process along the way. If you can't enjoy the process, don't do it. Find a way to find joy along the way. Listen to your favorite music on that long drive to vacation. Try a new recipe every week while you are working on losing some weight. Drink wine for no reason on a Wednesday night with your best friend and then do another load of laundry. Find a way to enjoy today because the process IS the point! (Read that again.)
So there you have it. Therapy through quilting. And now I'm off to throw dinner in the instapot, prep for another interview, and feed my dogs. It may not be a perfect Thursday, but it's a pretty good one - and I may just finish another flower along the way.
Here are a bunch of pictures (probably too many) of the progress I've made on my blocks so far. You will notice (I hope) all the different stages these guys are in... and that I'm not working on them in order. LOL Conformity be damned! LOL
Cheers!
*You may be thinking that just by choosing a pattern instead of free form creating from my imagination I have caved to "the masses" and am attempting just to recreate someone else's vision. You aren't wrong. But I will be the first person to recognize my strengths and where I can use some help from someone with different talents.
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