Picture of the Week - 9/27/2019

I remember EXACTLY where I was and what I was doing at this time 17 years ago - I was gazing in amazement and wonder at our firstborn SON.  

We didn't know if he was going to be a boy or a girl.  We were completely unprepared.  We were ridiculously excited.  We were instantly in love.

We could never have predicted all the ups and downs and sideways we've had raising this child...  man-child now.  Spencer made us parents, but he's done so much more than that along the way.  He's filled us with pride, love, fear, frustration, elation.  It's everything - and I wouldn't trade it for anything.  Watching him change over the years has been nothing short of amazing.

At 17 - and 6' 230 pounds - Spencer is more adult than child now.  His time here at home with us is short.  And while sometimes than turns me a little melancholy as we talk about college and careers and futures, it mostly makes me excited to see what he's going to go accomplish.  He has plans.  He has dreams.  And they are his alone.  Just as I would have never ever in a million years imagined myself with 4 sons, the path Spencer is staring down is not something I would have chosen.  And yet...  it's perfect.  It's his.  It's God's.  

I can't wait to see how the next 12 months unfolds.  I can't wait to see what decisions this boy of ours makes as he lays the foundation for the rest of his life.  Actually no...  he's not laying foundation...  his foundation has already been completed.  It's firm and it's strong and it's rooted in morals and ideals that Bob and I have built into our family.  And thinking about the fact that we've been blessed to have the opportunity to pour this into such a strong, smart, capable human fills me with pride and joy.

Spencer - take the many tools and lessons you have learned, combine these with your own dreams and wishes using your unique and special combination of strengths and abilities and go do great things.  Have the happiest of birthdays - and go out and SLAY this year!  You have the biggest cheerleaders and supporters behind you and we have confidence and faith that you are going to continue to be amazing.  The sky (or space?) is the limit!  I love you!

PS - thank you to all of you who have taken a moment over the last week to reach out with your thoughts and support about my recent job change.  Your prayers and advice and encouragement have meant the world to me.  Thank you!  (no news yet, but lots of irons in the fire...)

Picture of the Week - 9/19/2019

I haven't shared any Brutus pictures in a long time.  I'm not really sure why...  he's a pretty huge part of our family - even if his legs are abnormally short for a Golden Retriever.

He is SO goofy.  I've always heard about how silly Goldens are - and all the stories are true.  He's a goober.  A big lovable goober.

He's also really good on a leash now.  So good that even I don't worry about letting the boys take him out on a leash - and everyone knows I'm super paranoid about the dogs!  He walks to the bus stop with the boys every morning, where he visits with all his bus stop friends and then wishes them a good day at school before returning home to nap and play all day with Ozzie.  Then he gets to go back to the bus stop to gather up his boys, visit with his bus stop friends again, and then head back home for more playing and cuddles.  

He loves it and all the kids love it.  I'm pretty sure getting off the school bus and being greeted by a friendly, goofy, fluffy white dog would make me pretty happy too!

This weekend we get a visit from Grandpa Bob and Grandma Phyllis.  We are really looking forward to watching some football games with them!  They picked a great weekend to visit because they should be able to see all 3 guys play - and the weather looks pretty amazing!  Plus, tomorrow night's varsity game is youth night - so it's family affair!

Have a great week everyone!

Picture of the Week - 9/12/2019

No better way to say it than to just say it.  I was laid off.  And it's been a pretty crazy week because of that, very unexpected, news.

Let's be honest, no one ever wants to hear that they are being cut from an organization.  It's not pleasant.  It's especially not pleasant when you have spent years busting your hiney for that organization.

So yeah, there's definitely some bitterness about this entire situation.

BUT (and please know that this is not just empty platitudes)

This is a blessing.  An answered prayer.  It's the push I needed to get myself back on track.  

I've been trying to make the best of a job situation that I haven't been truly happy with in years.  There's a reason I was on a mission of gratitude all summer - it was to try to convince my own self to see the good in a bunch of situations that I didn't love and wasn't happy about.  And it really IS possible to see good in just about any situation.  (Job loss included...)  

I have always hated traveling.  I don't like being away from the comfortable and the known...  and yet, I got to SEE so much and DO so much because this job forced me into travel.  Hard not to be grateful for those opportunities.  And now I get some down time.  I'm not naïve enough to think I'll never travel again, but I can pretty much guarantee that I won't be taking another job which requires multiple international trips each year.  Last year I traveled to the UK 9 times.  That's too much and it was becoming too hard.

I didn't really want to go back to school.  I didn't really feel like I needed another master's degree.  I was grateful that I was chosen and would have done my very best to do my very best to finish the program.  I met some great people and learned some important things.  I am also so very relieved that I don't need to finish it.  I sit here with a Financial Management assignment sitting in front of me that I no longer need to worry about.  I don't need to read or study on weekend mornings any more.  I've regained my free time.

I am sure that my crazy schedule and my utter stubbornness to keep on keeping on has had an impact on my boys.  I am blessed that I have been able to role model what dedication in the face of challenges looks like, but I would be lying if I said that leaving them (over and over again) wasn't one of the hardest things my soul has ever had to endure.  It sucked every single time.  And as time went on it was getting harder and harder.  No more.  I am not going to miss another football game because I'm on an overnight flight to Scotland.  I will be here for them - in the flesh.

And Bob...  goodness I don't even know where to start.  I would not - no way - have been able to do the last 4 years without Bob.  He's taken the brunt of not only the extra work, but also my moods.  He's listened to me complain about the job, the work, the travel, some of the people, and many unfortunate situations.  He did nothing but support me.  And I will be forever indebted to him for being an absolute superstar rock for me - and the boys.  And you know what his first reaction was when this all happened, "Thank God!  It's about time!"

I am not sad to be leaving this job.  I won't miss the crazy politics.  I won't miss the unreasonable demands on time and talent.  I will miss some of the people.  And I will walk away with the knowledge that if I had it to do all over again, there is VERY little I'd do differently.  My head is high.

It was time for change and I very deeply believe that God answered prayers sent up on how to get out of the situation - in a slightly unusual way.  He forced my hand - and I feel so blessed.  

So it's onward and upward.  Time to find a new job.  No current imminent opportunities, but we are nearly at the top of Q4 and there's a LOT of work in this area.  I am confident that I will be lead to a situation that's better for me and for my family.  It's time to put my priorities back in the right order and to focus on the things that really matter.

If you happen to know of any Director level product management positions, please send them my way.  In the meantime, say a prayer - not for a new job, but a prayer of thanks - of gratitude.

If you need me over the next couple of weeks, I'll be quilting or reading.  Then Fall break and job hunt!

Picture of the Week - 9/5/2019

Happy September everyone!

We had SUCH a nice, relaxing long weekend.  I hope you were all able to enjoy the weekend and the down time!  Ahhhh..... recharged batteries!

(And clean rooms...  spent some time clearing out Spencer and Quinn's rooms.  Anyone wanna guess at the most disgustingly hilarious item we found?)

This week is back to normal - football, wrestling, work.

Spencer is playing in tonight's JV game.  The Varsity team is off this week.  Beck and Zane both have games on Saturday morning.  Then Buckeyes and getting Spencer off to Homecoming.  It's supposed to be in the mid-90s on Sunday, so thinking maybe we can hit the pool after church for a bit.  Then back to Monday we go.  Here's a football edition of "Blue Steel" for your Thursday viewing pleasure.