Picture of the Week - 9/8/2022

 Let's see...  what's new?  

Nothing - everything

I asked Spencer how he was doing the other day and his response was something like "same as yesterday, I think I'm in Groundhog's Day".  And that's kinda how I feel.  It's the same every day - get up, get kids out the door, work until my back aches, take a break, work some more, dinner, pick someone up or drop someone off or both, do load of stinky football uniforms, brush teeth, go to bed.  Next day - basically the same...  pick-up/drop-off routine may change and sometimes we throw in a game for fun.  But it's rinse and repeat.  

And in that day in - day out - same same same - it's REALLY easy to lose sight of what is actually happening.  Progress and growth and decisions and and and.  It's not a small, meaningless, repetitive existence here.  These days of "puttin in the work" are, in the end, the important ones.  These are the days that make us who we are.  Am I right?

Yes, the vacation pictures and game highlights and dinners out with friends get all the limelight on the socials, but these "normal" days are where the real magic happens.  

And it's so easy to forget that.  I admit I get lost in planning vacations I may never take.  I reminisce in FB memories of big game moments from years past and look forward to the ones that have yet to happen.  I scour restaurant menus and arrange plans to "get out".  I do all these things because they are exciting.  So today, I'm reminding myself - as much as you teeny number of people out there still paying attention to these POTW messages - that exciting is fleeting.  The routine and mundane should be just as celebrated because it's just as (I will say more, even) important.  

Life is ACTUALLY the stuff in between the highlight reel...

So what's new?  Nothing - everything

All boys are well and settled very nicely into the fall "real life" stuff.  Spencer has decided not to wrestle this year.  I was sad, at first, but he's really happy to not have that pressure, stress, and time commitment anymore.  And he's taken up Rugby on the Citadel club team.  He is taking a LOT of classes this semester and handling things pretty well so far.  He's got a good roommate this year, whom he likes and generally seems happy.  Tomorrow he's interviewing for some internships next summer and apparently he's got a "hot date" this weekend too.  All good there - and we are looking forward to going to see him for Parent's Weekend again in a few weeks.  

Quinn continues to be GOOD.  He spent Labor Day weekend on campus and with the extra downtime, headed to Savannah for dinner.  Sounds so glam!  At one point both Spencer and Quinn were on Islands (Daniel and Tybee, respectfully) while Bob and I sat at home listening to the rain and cleaning stuff.  Those boys are living their best lives...  Quinn also got to learn how to deal with a flat tire on the interstate.  He got to talk to tow truck operators and find a tire repair place and all kinds of grown-up stuff.  (Of course he called me first for help.  Why me?  Tires are a dude thing.  I handed the phone to Bob like it was on fire!)

Zane is still crushing 7th grade.  He's frustrated with football this year because as a 7th grader on a 7/8 team he's not getting a ton of playing time.  He's a lineman - and a good one - but he's undersized.  He gets some playing time, but not like he's used to.  This is not a unique experience - and honestly it's exactly what we expected - but it's new for him.  He's still having fun on the team with all his buddies though - and really isn't that what's most important anyway.  (We aren't shy about our desire to leave football and go full-time wrestling with ZnB at some point, but the timing is totally up to them!)

And Beckett is just adorable.  He is home alone with us a LOT more than he's ever been before.  First of all he's on "early elementary" time this year, which means he gets home at like 2:45.  Zane wouldn't get home until 5 without football practice - with football, they never see each other.  Beck leaves in the am before Zane wakes up.  Then he's out the door for wrestling/football practice before Zane gets home and by the time everyone is back under one roof, it's time for bed.  I think there were around 48 hours last week those 2 didn't even SEE each other.  Weird!  Also hard to make dinner plans...  Anyway, Beck is great.  He's funny and helpful and he talks A LOT. 

Here's a picture of Beck with his serious football face.  His football experience this year has been interesting.  This is the first year Bob hasn't coached him since he was 6.  He's been bounced to a few positions (all on the lines...  Bob and I make ATVs, not sports cars) and has landed in an O guard spot and right D tackle.  He's having a blast this year and it's pretty fun to watch him make his own way.  

OK - enough rambling...  I'm off to pick up Zane and reheat some dinner for him.  Then comes the load of stinky laundry, brush teeth and bed.  :)

Picture of the Week - 2/11/2021

 High school wasn't, how do I put this, my favorite.  There were definitely highlights!  I made some great friends - and I met my soulmate.  It wasn't ALL bad - not even close.  But I don't look back at high school as my peak.  I don't consider the things I did in those 4 years as my biggest accomplishments.  High school was something I had to get through and had fun doing so.  I knew pretty early that it was meant to prepare me for the future ahead and wasn't, by a long stretch, the ultimate goal.

That's my background and feelings about high school.  It colors the way I have looked at high school for my boys.  It's preparatory.  It's lessons and learning - both academically and socially.  It's part of the maturation process.  I've never looked at the things my boys have/will accomplish as the peak of their life experiences.  My expectations are higher.  

(I'm a joy to live with...)

All of the above makes it particularly surprising to me that I am repeatedly and genuinely weepy over the fact that Spencer's last high school wrestling tournament starts tomorrow.  This sport (which I will be the first to say is preparation and lessons and part of a bigger journey) has meant so much to Spencer - and to us through him and Quinn - that it is painful to know that it's over.  I am so proud of all that he's accomplished.  I am so grateful for all that this experience has given him.  And I am so sad that it's nearly over.

And yet, Spencer is not.  He is so much more pragmatic about all of this than I am.  He knows this is part of the journey, just as I knew my high school accomplishments were only a chapter in my book when I was his age.  He's not done yet.  He has bigger things to go do.  He has college and a career and a life to go live.   Maybe wrestling will be a part of his future.  Maybe it won't.  Either way the best is yet to come for him - and the lessons learned through wrestling these years have prepared him well.  He is ready to move forward.  He's ready to tackle this crazy world of ours and create an amazing life.  

Tomorrow Spencer and his team will wrestle in the Georgia State Wrestling Championship tournament.  Spencer won the tournament last weekend and has a good chance of placing again this year at State - but he's got work to do.  It won't be easy.  Nothing worth doing is easy.  His dedication to this sport and his mindset and focus to be his best are some of the most impressive things I have ever seen.  He is ready.  He is the master of his fate and the captain of his soul.

(Wrestling starts tomorrow at 1.  Watch for updates on FB and if you are interested in following along, check out the tournament on trackwrestling.com)

Picture of the Week - 1/7/2021

 Happy 2021

Today I am focused on a few things that I thought I'd share - in no particular order.  

1) Blinders

There is continued unrest happening all around the country.  (For future me reading this many years from now, there are protests and distrust a growing push for more division in areas that I never would have expected.)  And I am pretty focused on securing my blinders and keeping my head down.  This doesn't mean I support it.  It doesn't mean I condone it.  It means I'm choosing my happiness above a need to "be in the know" and certainly above any kind of thought that I need other people to feel the way I do.  My sons' coach posted last night about how much he loves his "bubble" - of family, community, school, team.  I am with him on this.  We have it pretty damn good in our bubble and (at least for now) that's where my focus is.  The rest...  outside my blinders.

2) Pause

My word for the year is Pause.  It took me a while to get to this word.  In the last couple of years I've chosen Joy and Gratitude and - honestly - I feel that the focus I gave these words changed who I am.  Maybe I was gonna change anyway.  Maybe not.  Either way, I'm hoping the choice of this word will have a similar impact.  I want to get better at responding - not reacting.  I especially need this reminder with my boys - and at work if I'm being honest.  I want to remember to stop, to think, and to pray instead of feeling the need to immediately react.

3) My relationships

There are people who regularly pour into me and I want to get better at pouring back into these people first.  I am going to try hard this year to accept the gifts of friendship and love without questioning motivation - and to worry less about the dull relationship spots because life is too short to focus too much on people who don't love me back.  I am particularly focused on my relationships with my boys - especially that one who will be leaving us in 6 short months - and with God.  (It is not lost on me that my relationship with my spouse comes easy 95% of the time and I consider it one of the biggest blessings in my life.)

4) Mindset control 

Not like any kind of sci-fi thing, but more like the "this isn't a good thing for me to dwell on/worry about, so stop".  I've been on this mission for a while now because it is true that you have to train your brain to see positivity.  It's actually been studied many times that you can be happier just by practicing gratitude.  That's powerful.  So I will continue to be mindful of how I'm feeling and what I can do to be intentionally happier.  (This makes it sound like somehow I'm unhappy or something - which is far from true.  It's more that I don't think this is a "task" that can be called "complete" and will probably be on my list of focus areas for the rest of my life because I choose Happy.)

5) Birds

A strange one, to be sure, but something that I am having a lot of fun with - and also happens to support several of the items above.  We have a bird feeder in our backyard.  We started filling it regularly back when the pandemic hit - so we've been through 3 full seasons now.  My parents gifted me a bird bath for my birthday and that has made our backyard an even bigger target destination.  If you have ever been here, you may remember that our backyard backs up to a wetlands area.  So we have lots of nature back there - big trees and stuff to create habitat for birds of all kinds.  We have hawks, a super cool woodpecker with a bright red head, a paid of bonded morning doves, a couple of giant blue jays, and bunch of brown birds I can't identify without a Georgia bird book.  My favorite though is a big, extended family of cardinals.  We started with a few and they apparently had a REALLY productive year.  We now have about 10 males and an equal - at least - number of females.  They hang out in a big flock all together and it's so cool.  I love these birds.  I can see them from where I work and they are a huge source of conference-call distraction.  I can't tell you the number of times that I look out there and see a flurry of activity and can't help but smile.  It's really cool!  I actually just bought another, bigger feeder.  We are going to be the hot spot for birds in Forsyth County!

This picture doesn't do my birds justice at all...  but I thought it would be a nice reminder of what I spent a year looking at while working from the house.  (No talk of going back to office, so who knows... if/when that will happen.)

I'd love to hear what you are focused on this year - and if you are ever here, ask to see my birds.  :)

This weekend Spencer and Quinn are wrestling in a Duals tournament and then next week we are diving into the Region tournament.  Hard to believe the season only has 5 weeks left.  Last weekend we won another tournament, but they went "no spectators" so we didn't get to see.  I think we should be able to go watch from here on out.

Picture of the Week - 10/29/2020

 Having expectations is a recipe for disaster.

(And as a planner, this is something that is really hard for me to admit/learn/remember)

If 2020 has taught us NOTHING else, it's that things don't always (ever?) turn out the way we think they are going to.  Sometimes things are worse, but lots of times things are better.  

When I get caught up thinking about how something SHOULD be or how someone SHOULD act or what we SHOULD do, then I get flustered and disappointed when the picture in my head doesn't match reality.  Which is kind of dumb because reality is, well real, while the picture in my head is nothing but imagination.  Granted, this imagination is flavored with experience and knowledge and not fantasy...  but still, the point is the same.  If I have an expectation, the reality is not going to match (hardly ever) and then I am disappointed or flustered or whatever - instead of just being PRESENT to enjoy the actual moment.

Says easy, does hard sometimes...  but it's a process, an evolution, a journey.  I'm better at this now (by about a million percent) than I was 15 years ago.  Raising kids will do that to you!  

The annual trip to Burt's Pumpkin Farm is a really good illustration of an activity that I think we all have expectations built around because we've done it for 17 straight years.  We know the route to take, we know how long the drive is, we know when to go to avoid the crowds, we know what the hay ride is like, we know the story the talking pumpkins will tell on the mid-ride stop, we know we will overpay for pumpkins, and we know at least one boy will pick a tiny pumpkin that we will find around March in their room.  Experience tells us these things, so it's pretty easy to create an expectation from the day.

Then reality happens and you can either drop the expectation and enjoy the moment or dwell in the "loss" of whatever the day was "supposed" to look like because of an expectation that is, honestly, nothing but an imaginary dream.  

Our Burt's trip this year happened about a month later than normal because of all sorts of reasons - weather, trips, etc.  Also, it's 2020, so I don't know how/if Covid impacted their farm.  When we showed up, instead of seeing a field of different shapes and sizes of pumpkins, we saw mostly damp mulch and mud across the bulk of the empty field.  It was definitely not up to the ideal imaginary expectation - or even really on par with even our worst previous trip.  

We could have been disappointed and let it ruin our day.  Instead, we laughed.  

Because it was FUNNY!  We grabbed a few pictures, grabbed a few pumpkins, skipped the hay ride and headed back home.  It was definitely not the way I expected the day to go, but I think it's pretty safe to say that 2020 has taught us all to just roll with the punches and deal with whatever comes around the corner.  

2 months left, here's hoping November and December simmer down some!

This weekend we have playoff football games and then a Halloween block party thing before Trick-or-Treating.  

Also - Wrestling season started!!!  I'm so excited for this season.  It's such a great group of kids and the program is so much fun.  I really hope we get to have a season - and I'm trying hard not to have any expectations about what that might look like!  For now, I'm happy for every day my boys get to be on that mat!

Picture of the Week - 9/10/2020

 This past weekend was the 1 year anniversary of the day I got laid off from my job.  It was the start of what is certainly one of the strangest 12 month periods I've lived through - so far at least.  So I've done some reflecting...

There are a lot of things that have changed in the last 12 months.  Some of them obvious (I don't travel any more) and some of them likely a bit more subtle (I've gotten much more spiritual).  I've had my confidence shaken and I've been fearful of what the future will bring.  I've celebrated new beginnings and learned how to be more flexible.  I've reached out to others and I've withdrawn into myself.  I've created and planted and read and cleaned and renovated.  And I've sat staring dumbly at stupid TV.  I've been disappointed and elated.  I've canceled plans and I've made new ones.

In the last 12 months I have realized that there are really only a few things that are truly important to me - God, my family, and my health.  

My job loss forced me off a merry-go-round that was going too fast for me to be happy and healthy.  It also forcibly removed me from a situation that was more toxic in hindsight than I could see in real time.  It wasn't what I asked for, but it was exactly what I needed.  Then Covid forced me to slow down even more and focus on the people closest to me.  If those two situations - a one-two punch if you will - weren't a sign from God to take heed, then I don't know what is.  

I've mentioned before that I have a sincere hope that people will use whatever their experiences are through this pandemic as an opportunity to SEE something new - in themselves, in the world, in God.  I hope that there are lessons learned and that this whole mess isn't for naught.  I pray this regularly.  Actually - forget the Covid mess - I pray that people will use all of their experiences (good and bad) as a way to be better.  I can look back at some of my hardest times (think 2 lb Quinn in the NICU for 42 days with a 16 month old at home, for example) and realize that GOOD came out of that situation.  I pray that everyone can choose to be grateful whatever the scenario.  This is the reason I am always sharing Gratitude reminders on Facebook.  It's my mission to remind people that there is always something to be grateful for.

I can only speak for myself in saying that 12 months into this tumultuous year I am happier and I have better relationships with all the fine men who share my home.  I think that's a pretty big deal.  And I am thankful to God for leading me to this place - however weird the road.  

Here's a fun picture of my big boys from last weekend's wrestling tournament.  It wasn't a particularly successful weekend for them as Quinn ran through a bunch of REALLY good competition and Spencer hurt his foot in the very first match and was forced to sit out the rest of the tourney.  But they learned a lot, they had fun with their friends, and I got this amazing picture of my boys.  

Have a great week everyone!  

Picture of the Week - 4/30/2020

Day 49

I really wish I had something fun and exciting to share.  I've got nothing...

We are all still healthy and hanging in there.  Some days (hours) are better than others.  Georgia continues to lead most the rest of the country in opening things back up and trying to get back to normal.  We are all still just waiting a bit to see how it goes. 

I saw a picture/meme on Facebook this morning - and warn you that I will probably share this to my own FB feed in the very near future, so be prepared for the repeat.  It got me thinking, so I thought I'd ask the question to you.

What have you learned during this time that you want your future self to remember?  (NOTE - this is not a rhetorical question, I'd really like to know the answer.)

For me it is the following, in no particular order

1. My boys are all pretty interesting people.  They are also incredibly diverse.  I don't think I'd know their personalities nearly as much without watching them progress through the last 7 weeks.  Their individual approaches have been fascinating to me.

2. Having control is probably over-rated, which is a really big lesson for me that I, honestly, have to re-learn pretty regularly.  Life is mysterious and control is an illusion.  Sometimes the best thing to do is to just let go, go on, and trust.

3. Speaking of trust, I have grown my faith/religion/beliefs 100 fold over the last 6 months.  To be fair, this really starts probably around this time last year, but the job loss and now this Covid situation has accelerated everything.  I feel closer to God than I ever have before and have found incredible peace.

4. Being busy is not the same as being happy.

Your turn - what have you learned during this time that you want your future self to remember?  Just for fun, here's a picture of Brutus that I took while on a walk (during one of the no so good hours if I'm being honest). Brutus is living his best life and if/when we all start to leave the house again that dog may need therapy.

Picture of the Week - 4/9/2020

I think we are on day 28 of the quarantine/social distancing/wierdness of 2020

That's 4 weeks.  

The governor of Georgia just extended our "shelter in place" until the end of April.  This week was spring break for the boys.  Next week I was supposed to take Spencer to Virginia Military Academy for a wrestling camp and college visit.  I got an email from work yesterday letting us know that they have deactivated all our security badges - meaning we can't go back into the office even if we wanted to.  Weird and disconcerting times for sure.

So before all of this stuff happened Bob and I had recommitted to church.  We actually did that before I got laid off and it was honestly one of the best things for my mental well-being during that situation.  Literally weeks before Covid hit we both signed up to participate in small groups.  I've never done anything like that before.  It was well outside my comfort zone...  

And yet, I felt so compelled to do it.  It felt like something I needed.  

The messages we have heard from our church - and the conversations I've had with a group of women who started as strangers in my small group have lead to some additional things.  I've ordered books based on their recommendations.  I've listened to music and podcasts that wouldn't have caught my attention in the past.  I am more spiritually aware now than I have ever been.  It's strange for me to think of it as an awakening, but it's certainly new information that I have learned and has taught me to look at other things differently.  You can label that whatever you want...

All of these things - along with an overhaul of my social media feeds to get rid of people and places that spewed unhelpful, depressing drivel and replace with uplifting, inspirational, and HAPPY - have lead me to some thoughts and beliefs about what's going on with the Coronavirus - and what I should do about it.  I don't know if my approach is the right one for everyone, but I hope it causes anyone who reads this to at least pause and consider.

Because pausing and contemplating is what God wants us to be doing right now.  We have literally been forced to throw plans out the window.  We are riding out these days with our families.  We have had to really prioritize what is important.  

And that's what I have done - started to focus more on what I believe will bring me growth and comfort and happiness.  I've cherished the 28 straight days of family around the dinner table.  I've recognized - and shared - how blessed I am to get to do life with my best friend.  I've noticed how each of my boys has dealt with this and I understand them better than ever before.  I'm so grateful to watch the relationships between brothers grow and thrive.  (Temporary, often daily, spats aside)

None of the above needed a packed schedule full of activities.  It DID need human interaction and connection.  Mother Teresa has a quote that I've always loved and it couldn't be more relevant than it is today.  She said, "If you want to change the world, go home and love your family."  Maybe, just maybe, humanity needed a reminder to slow down and love.  Maybe, just maybe that reminder came from God and the end-result, despite what the main stream media says and what happens in the stock market, is going to be just what we all needed.

Hope hasn't been cancelled.  

Love hasn't been cancelled.

Gratitude hasn't been cancelled.

Faith is alive.

I am at peace with the Quarantine of 2020.

PS - this doesn't mean I don't have bad days, outbursts of frustration, boredom, etc.  I get mad.  I get sad.  I have eaten too many Cheezits.  I am not all rose-colored glasses and Pollyanna viewpoints.  I regularly need to remind myself how I WANT TO think about this just situation.  I have to be intentional.  It's not an accidental perspective because as human's we are FAR more likely to fall into "gloom and doom" thought than to choose to be positive.  It's innate - it's science.  If you don't believe me, spend a few hours on the internet looking at study after study after study digging into the biology/chemistry/neuropsychology of happiness.  

Here's a picture of Beckett chilling in the living room at some point on some day recently - they really do blur together a bit.  He had his dogs.  He was fed, safe, protected and happy.  We all are.  And that is worth stopping to offer up some praise, don't you think?

Take care as we move through what many people are saying will be the peak of this disease.  Stay safe.  Stay sane.  And my hope for you is that you can choose to be intentional about what you will walk away from Covid-19 having learned/felt/decided.  

Have a very happy Easter everyone!  It's going to be one we will never forget.  Make it a great day!

Picture of the Week - 12/26/2019

So this is the last POTW message I will write this year.  It's also the last message I will write this decade.  Wow!

If there were ever a time to stop and do a little reflection, it's got to be now, am I right?

I was thinking the other day about these messages.  To be honest, I was also dwelling on the fact that my "recipient list" has shrunk a lot over the years.  Back in the early days I sent these little weekly broadcasts out to a lot more people.  I suppose things may have been more interesting at the beginning than they are now.  We were adding babies to the family.  We were dealing with healthcare diagnosis and surgeries and appointment updates.  We were able to share a wide variety of cute things that adorable toddlers and preschoolers do on the regular.  Teenagers are slightly less cute.

These days, we are settled into the business of raising a family.  Our world is so very different at the end of this decade than it was at the end of the last one.  Late in 2009 we had just completed the process of rocking our whole world by adding a new baby to our established little family.  That wasn't a particularly easy transition, if I'm being honest.  But goodness gracious I can't even imagine having made a different decision.  We would most certainly be different people if Zane (and eventually Beckett) hadn't joined our family.  Different isn't always better.  In this case, it's certainly not.

In 2009 we were still able to manage the sports practice schedule without calling in reinforcements and we still took entire months off without obligations to some coach or another.  These days, we are tied to a calendar and to the practice and tournament schedules given to us from a variety of different coaches - times 4.  It's definitely a busier lifestyle than we had back when I started writing these little messages.  Bob and I laugh often about how young couples without kids talk about how busy they are and how tired they are because we know what's coming.  Today we know we need to go to bed early.  We know when to save energy and how to prioritize both our time and the never-ending To-Do lists.  My house/yard/job is always in need of something.  My boys almost never are...  feels like a good balance for today.

At the end of the last decade I was halfway through my time at the job where I learned to be a product manager.  It was a time of push and pull for me for sure.  I was busy growing babies and growing my career at the same time and, in hindsight, probably also taking a bunch of things for granted that I shouldn't have been so blind to.  At the end of this decade I think I can safely say that I have matured enough to know where my priorities should be and am on a journey to make sure I treat these things with the importance they deserve.  Goodness knows I'm not perfect and I know this thing we call life is more a journey than a destination.  Shame it's taken me 45 years to figure out that the goal is to enjoy the ride instead of waiting on the goal line.

I'm estimating here, but I guess that I've sent somewhere around 885 of these weekly email messages.  17 years x 52 weeks (plus a few months in 2002 minus a very few weeks here and there where I missed a week).  885 of anything is a lot.  For me to ask you all to come along with me on this journey and to take time out of your week 885 times seems a tremendous imposition.  And yet, it is also one of the greatest gifts you could have given me.  To know that there are people out there following along with our little family who care enough to read these ramblings from time to time provides an (often) invisible umbrella of support to me that I couldn't be more thankful for as I look back over the last 10 years and look forward to the next 10.  

Thank you for your love and support over the years.  Thank you for caring about me and my family enough to spare us some of your valuable time - and your more valuable thoughts and prayers!  You are appreciated and you are loved.

My wish for all of you as we move into this next decade is that you will find gratitude in the everyday-ness of everyday.  That you will feel love and light pouring into you from everyone you encounter - but especially from those you love and care for in return.  And that you will be happy and healthy and have all you need through today, tomorrow and the next decade.  I hope you are all still reading along with my story in 2029 when I will (God willing) have 2 boys off in the world and 2 more working through the joys of high school.  If you are looking for me at any time over the next 10 years, check the local gymnasium's tournament schedule.  I'll probably be there...

Thank you!  God bless!  Have a super happy New Year!!

Picture of the Week - 12/19/2019

Next week is Christmas!!!  Who's excited???  I can't wait!

This is the first year in a really long time that I haven't had an extended break/vacation around Christmas/New Year.  It dawns on me that I haven't shared a job-related update with the POTW since I announced that I had lost my old job.  So here's the update...  I got a new job.  :)

While I continue to be bothered (really hurt is probably a better word) about how things ended at Craneware, I really couldn't have asked for a better exit strategy from the situation there than what ended up happening.  It really was (and continues to be) an answered prayer.  

The job hunt is not fun for me.  I'm sure there are personality types out there who love the thrill of the hunt.  They do it without tying too much of the process to themselves and are probably healthier than I am (mentally) because of it.  For me, the uncertainty of not knowing what was going to happen was just awful.  I hated it.  I hated it a lot!

Looking at the situation from the outside, it's probably hard to understand why I hated going through it.  We were not in financial trouble.  The job search net I threw out was very small (and I could certainly have widened it if/when needed.)  And while every encounter didn't result in a positive outcome, the VAST majority of activities I completed during the job hunt ended in success.  I honestly really only had one result that was really disappointing to me - and in hindsight even that was exactly what needed to happen.  And during all of this, I was not working and basically doing what I wanted - during the nicest part of the Atlanta weather-year.

I ended up with the first job I applied for - which is not the way these things normally go!  A bit of background...  going into the WAY BACK machine.

When Bob and I were first starting our careers (a good 20 years ago now - ouch) Bob landed at ADP and I went to work for a small 300 person .com company.  We both grew and matured and moved up in our organizations.  We joked a lot that the personality of a .com company (fast, loose, chaotic) fit Bob more than me and the conservative, stoic nature of a 60k employee company like ADP was really more aligned to my preferences.  It sorta become obvious about 3 years in (this is 17 years ago if you don't want to work the math out...) that someday I should try to get a job at ADP.  

And ADP jobs have been on my radar ever since.  It's just never really been the right time.  

I left Optio after 7+ years and went to work for a healthcare software company which set my career direction for years to come.  In the 5+ years I was there I learned how to be a product manager and grew a huge network of people.  From there I bounced a couple of times - sticking in the healthcare software niche.  The move to Craneware in 2015 was utilizing my network of colleagues, sticking close to home from a market perspective, and something that felt like it could be a good opportunity.  All of the companies I have worked for were small and all of them have had issues.  (Aside, ALLLLLLLL companies have problems...  I know there isn't a perfect work place out there!)  Little did I realize when I joined Craneware that in addition to providing me with some amazing opportunities to travel and learn and continue to build my professional network, I was also walking into a pretty toxic environment.  In a weird combination (clash) of people who grew that company from the ground up and newbies (outsiders?) like me who were trying to come in to help it succeed, an environment of blame and fear and politics flourished.  Clearly I didn't play well there - and so they wiped me out.  

And when they did, they presented me with the right time to go after a role at ADP.  Told ya it was an answered prayer.  :)

Here's the issue that I had to deal with through this situation...  ADP is BIG.  It's SLOW - particularly in HR.  And if there were ever a company where silos of people work side by side and don't know each other - it's here.  Bob, despite working for ADP for nearly 20 years, didn't have good contacts in the Product Management organization.  He reached out to a few people, but none of them were all that helpful.  I happened to have a former colleague that is now in product management at ADP and when I reached out to her to discuss the company, people, work, etc. she was more than forthcoming - but she wasn't at all helpful in getting my resume pushed forward.  So while I applied first to ADP, I didn't hear anything for a REALLY long time.  To be honest, I lost hope that I'd be able to get a foot in the door.  (Sidebar - never lose hope.)

The very day of my final interview/presentation for a job I ended up not getting (despite making it through like 5 rounds of interviews) I had a call with a woman who is now my boss.  To be honest, I was pretty sure I was going to get that other role and didn't really prep for the ADP screening discussion.  I don't actually even remember most of it.  

Fast forward a few days and I got rejected for the job I thought I was going to get and the next day got invited back for more interviews at ADP.  Things work out.  

I am now managing ADP's Talent Management solutions as part of the National Accounts team.  I have 3 solutions under me and work with a number of different teams.  I am literally just getting my feet wet here, but when I heard that there isn't a single person on my team that has a tenure of less than 5 years, I knew without a shadow of a doubt, that I made the right choice to join this group.  Employees don't stick around if they don't feel valued and this group has stuck around for a LONG time.  

I'm excited to see what the future brings.  I'm excited to be a part of the ADP team.  And it's SUPER weird (and awesome) that Bob is in my WORK Instant Messenger system!  

So it's a pretty good trade off to have this opportunity hitting right at the end of the year - which means no PTO time for me this year.  It's a small sacrifice to get the chance to (finally) work for this company that I've had my eye on for such a long time.  And it's a huge relief to have the ordeal of the last 3 months in the rear view mirror.  

Newsy stuff

- Spencer is off to TN this weekend for an individual tournament.  He and Bob are leaving tomorrow morning.  

- Quinn is wrestling in a JV Dual tomorrow night

- Zane and Beck are also wrestling tomorrow night in an individual tournament - it's a divide-and-conquer kinda day!

Sunday we have church and then a Christmas party at the wrestling gym and Monday evening starts the Christmas festivities.  I can't wait to celebrate Christmas this year!  We have SO VERY MUCH to be thankful for!

Thank you for all the love and support you have thrown our way this year (and all the years).  

Merry Christmas to all of you!!!

Picture of the Week - 11/21/2019

As we move quickly into Thanksgiving week, I really couldn't be more thankful for the extra time I've gotten to spend with the boys over the last couple of months.  It's been a blessing that I do not take for granted.  It will come to an end, but the impact these last weeks has had on me, my relationships with them, and my mindset about a great number of things will remain.  I am refreshed.  I am thankful.  Grateful.  Blessed.

I thought I'd share a glimpse into one of the most creative solutions to a "situation" that popped up at school in a long time.  Zane is in 4th grade this year and is in a class full of, let's call them high achievers.  He's having a great year.  He's always been a good student, but this year he's also getting into extracurriculars.  He was invited to join the Junior Beta club.  He participates in the running club.  He engages in a wide variety of ways and topics.  All in all, he's just an easy kid to parent through elementary school.

So I didn't really think much about it when he started talking about Pokémon again and pulled out the old Pokémon cards.  I mean this same thing happened with Minecraft...  what was cool for the big guys eventually becomes cool for the littles as well.  So we got all caught up on the world of Pokémon.  Turns out remarkably little changes...  and got used to the chatter between Zane and Beckett in what sounds suspiciously like a foreign tongue.

Then one day disaster struck.  His teacher thought that the Pokémon chat was becoming too big a distraction and she - GASP - banned the cards at school.  Zane was pretty bummed about this.  Then he ran outside to play...  and I didn't really think much more about it.  

A few days later he asked if we have any index cards.  Yes, of course.  What kind of respectable family with a bunch of kids in school doesn't have index cards.  Do you want white or colored?  He took a stack of the white ones and off he went.  I didn't ask why.  I didn't really care, to be honest.  

The next thing I knew, he was working on these cards every chance he got.  He pulled out a bunch of old colored pencils.  He carried them back and forth to school in a zip lock bag.  Finally curiosity got the best of me and I asked him what he was doing.  His answer was very matter-of-fact.  He and his friends were making their own battle/trading cards to sell to each other to take the place of the Pokémon cards.  They found a way around the teacher's ban.  LOL  And honestly, if I were the teacher, I would support this whole-heartedly!  These cards have rules, there's a storyline, there are drawings.  In short, there's some serious thought and creativity going into this project.  

I just love that kid and the way his mind works.  There's no stopping him - especially if he decides to work around whatever future roadblocks hit his path.  Lookout world...  Zane is coming for you!

Sporty news (because what's a POTW without a sporty update?)

- Spencer is back full time on the mats with the Varsity team.  He wrestled in his first dual last night and went 2-0 with a forfeit and a pin in 23 seconds.  

- Quinn wrestled JV yesterday and ran into another hammer who is working on dropping weight so he can get back onto his varsity team.  He lost, but gets to try again soon.

- Zane and Beck are doing a tourney on Sunday.  They are both ready and looking really good.  They are really motivated this year.  I'm excited to see what they can do!

- Quinn and the JV team are going to a tournament on Monday (which I'm really looking forward to seeing!)

- Both Spencer and Quinn are wrestling on Tuesday in the West Thanksgiving Duals.  This is always one of my favorite events - despite the amount of work that goes into making it run.  It's a fun one! 

Then we get to take a breather and enjoy some downtime for Thanksgiving break before hitting the ground RUNNING in December!